March 1 – New battles

Ana is actually dancing with her fifth grade class!

Ana is actually dancing with her fifth grade class!


About three months ago Ana’s father and I agreed for him to take a six month break in visitations in an effort for Ana to stabilize without the stress of bi-weekly visits to his house and for him to get help and training on how to best parent Ana. Fast forward three months and we have just began what is sure to be a nasty court battle. He insists this agreement was never made and I have just been refusing visitation.


The good news is that Ana is doing great! Her agitation is down. Her meds are down. Her self-injuring is way down. All proof that this break is, indeed, helping.

Now, don’t get me wrong, she is still no angel and there are still days where I want to beat my head against the wall. But, I think we are finally to a point where the anxiety has relaxed enough for us to really start attacking the RAD behaviors that turn her little world upside down.

**Sidenote*** Ana actually performed an entire dance number with her fifth grade class for parents and teachers. No joke! I never thought I’d see the day she voluntarily did something like that. (see pic above)

Now I am beginning the battle of unraveling her behaviors and symptoms to get the correct diagnosis. I’ve been doing a little research and am finding that ‘intellectual disability’ looks a lot like RAD. Hmmmm…it makes one think. I’ve been saying all along how there is no way her IQ score could be high when she refuses to try or cooperate while being tested.

Also, I’m hoping to determine and get a better diagnosis than Generalized Anxiety Disorder – it just doesn’t fit in my book. Her anxiety is anything but generalized!


4 thoughts on “March 1 – New battles

  1. Best wishes to you! I will say a prayer for your court battle and daughter. Custody problems can be so ridiculous. Not that everything else is a cake walk, but you know what I mean.

  2. It can be so hairy, can’t it? RAD and Intellectual Disabilities often look like one another, and what makes it more complicated is that they can also lead to one another. A child with RAD may have developmental delays/ID as a result of trauma/RAD, and people with ID may be more susceptible to RAD throughout their lives (depending on their developmental functioning level). I have been receiving training and doing research on this exact topic over the last few months; I am a social worker/behavior therapist for people with ID.

    Best wishes with your efforts in court and to do what is best for Ana. Glad to hear she is doing well!

    • I’m glad to hear you are researching this topic. It is a vicious cycle, isn’t it? I’m not so concerned about labels, but I like to know for my own well-being where her true disabilities are. I want to challenge her appropriately. I’d be interested in Ana participating if you are looking for case study participants!

      • My research is purely based off of what I read in other studies, so I am not doing any research of my own. I am currently working with several clients who have co-occurring diagnoses of RAD and ID, and I have been trying to determine the nest interventions and therapy strategies for them based on the available research. An interesting and challenging quest!

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